As many of you know, The Commish travels a bit for work. Ok, a lot.
And since 9/11, traveling has sucked. All thanks to our terrorist friends around the world. (Spineless piece of shit cowards)
At first we were all required to empty our pockets and walk through metal detectors. Then we had to start taking off our shoes (thank you idiot shoe bomber). Next we had to take off our coats and sweatshirts before walking through the aforementioned detector. And now we have to remove our shoes, our coats, our sweatshirts, the contents of our pockets and even our belts, and then go into a machine that quickly takes an x-ray of us. I could see the logic in a lot of the security measures up until the x-ray part. Do they really need to see picture of my unit before I board a plane? Whatever. It is what it is. So for the past 12.5 years, I’ve waited patiently in lines at the airport before boarding the hundreds of flights I’ve taken. And it’s been painful.
However, now I have TSA-Pre Check. And this is how it went when I showed up for a flight two weeks ago.
Commish: Hi, this is my first time through this lane, what do I need to do?
TSA: Take your cell phone out of your pocket and go through the metal detector.
Commish: That’s it?
TSA: Thats it.
You can keep your shoes on, your coat on, your belt on, your laptop can stay inside the bag, you can have change in your pockets, and they don’t take an x-ray of your penis!
For those of you having trouble imagining just how easy this process was, watch the video below. That’s exactly how I felt. I kept the shoes on my feet, the coat on my back and I was eating pizza in no time. Just like Tony Manero.
And, this is how I used to feel like going through security at airports.