March 31st 2016, game two of the playoffs.

The Red team was down two goals with 2minutes left in the game, fighting to see another day.  The goalie was pulled for the second week in a row.  The same move last week resulted in two goals being scored.  Could we do it again.

Miraculously, we did.   We not only scored two goals, but we scored three, and won the game.

Game three will decide who wins the 2015-2016 Honey Badger Cup.

Ok, some of you are scratching your head.  Check todays date.

Like I said, Don’t call it a comeback.


Congratulations to The Gray Team.

Once again, a great season.

The 2015-2016 Honey Badger Cup Champions are:

Kevin Drew, Matt Casey, Doug Gallacher, Dave Jagger, Matt Quail, Andy Weiner, Paul Giggey, Mike Pierce, Jim O’Brien, Aaron Callaway, Steve Murray, Eric Faulkner and Mike Luciano.

Both goalies will be put on the Cup due to this year’s format of switching teams at halftime.  Let it be noted that Stonewall edged Mad Mike in the goals against average (ok, by a lot), but both played great.

Also worthy of noting is Andy Weiner’s performance.  Andy was the MVP in the series and only the second MVP ever to be named in the HBHL playoffs.   Nice work, you dink.

The games were close, but at the end of the day The Red team couldn’t match pace with Gray.

And finally, congratulations to Jim O’Brien.  Jim is the 2015-2016 Iron Man Award recipient.    This is a new award that will be handed out to anyone who repeatedly takes crosschecks from Gun Show throughout the season but continues to play despite the numerous internal injuries that have occurred.  Unbelievable Jimmy.

Final skate is next week, and it will mark the end of season #4 of the HBHL.














Last night, the Gray team took on the Russians, aka The Big Red Machine, (aka the Red team) and nearly pulled off a miracle.

At least 5 people looked at me with a cocked eyebrow before the game started and asked what I was thinking when I made the lineups. (Never question Bruce Dickinson)

Even Derek said to me during warm ups, What’s with the lineups tonight?


RED TEAM – Weiner, Casey, Drew, Pierce, DiCenzo, Callaway, Shea, O’Brien, Giggey

GRAY Team – Kiley, Berube, Landry, Murray, Quail, O’Connor, Beaver, Kobelski, Lareau


To quote Herb Brooks:  You think you can win on talent alone? Gentlemen, you don’t have enough talent to win on talent alone.

The Gray team had some players but everyone was going to have to work their ass off to hang with the Red lineup.

And they did.

Final score 7-7.  Nice work boys.

Oh, and I guess it helped a little bit that Gray was shooting on Steven “Concussion” Croll, and The Red Army was shooting on Mad Mike Luciano (who came up with some ridiculous saves).

Croll, you’re crazy to be back in net, but we’ll have you on the ice with us anytime. (especially when you let The Commish go five hole)

In the handshake line, Croll says to me “last one”.


Another successful Pond Hockey Classic is in the books.  Somehow the organizers were able to pull off a miracle, given the temperatures leading up to the event.

At the end of the day, The Park Street Badgers defeated the Original Badgers and each team now has a 1-1 record against each other at the PHC.

This years event welcomed the following new players.

  • Aaron Callaway – Aaron  donned a Hanson Brother type wig (or a Cindy Crawford wig) during the Badger match.  Either way it was a distraction to the OB’s.   Don’t believe me?  Take a look at the video below and tell me you don’t think he’s hot.
  • Ed Hunter – Ed played like he was on speed.  Ed’s new nickname is Fast Eddie.  Ed probably should’ve taken a shift or two off during the game.  (It’s not all about you Ed).   And also, Ed’s not welcome on Thursday nights any more.
  • John Gilmartin – Um, let’s see here.  What can I say about #24.   He was there.  I can confirm that.  Early quotes from #24 included “you used to do this with just 6 players?”  and “this is a lot more work than I thought it was going to be.”  To his credit, he put the pedal down in the other facet of the tournament.  Great having you up #24.  Next time, don’t pass the pace car.
  • Scott Rickards – Better late than never.   #23 had to skip the first two games due to a wake.  I tried to convince him to skip the wake b/c the deceased would never know if he showed up or not, but he wasn’t buying it.   We could’ve used him in our games but it’s not likely he would’ve made a difference.  (yeah, right).  We had already crowned Scott the team’s MVP on Friday morning (before we played a single game) b/c he arranged to pick up TBone’s jersey in Andover, and a bottle of Tuaca (the team’s juice).  And then, he stayed up for 2 whole nights.  Nice work #23.

Here’s a video of the weekend, and some pictures.












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This is my suitcase. There are many like it, but this one is mine.

My suitcase is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it as I must master my life.
My suitcase, without me, is useless. Without my suitcase, I am useless.

So I landed in Chicago on Wed night.  Starving and pretty tired of sitting on dirty cramped airplanes.  I had to do a plane side bag check because the flight from Columbus to Chicago was on a small plane with no overhead storage.  No problem.

After touching down, I grabbed my suitcase (it was one of the first to be placed in the jetway, probably because they knew it belonged to The Commish), jumped in a cab and went to my hotel.   No Problem.

I checked in at 8:30pm, dropped my bag in the room and immediately went out to get some dinner.  No Problem.

Sat down at the bar, ordered a drink and some food and all was finally good.

And then I started getting a phone call from a number I didn’t recognize, and it was coming up as “Memphis TN”.   So I ignored it.  No Problem.

But it kept calling.  No Problem?

And then I got the following text:  “Hi Eric – my name is Shannon Williams.  I accidentally got your bag at the Chicago airport.  Please give me a call.”


Turns out, Shannon Williams had my bag and I had his.  And unfortunately, neither of us realized this before leaving the airport.  Oh, and he was staying 45 minutes North of Chicago.

Big Problem.

So I called him and we discussed putting each others bag in a cab and sending it to our respective hotels.  He was a nice guy (sounded like a total redneck) and he liked the idea but when he asked a cab to do that for him, they said no.  (Of course they said no.  His name is Shannon and he’s from the South.  And he probably had a heroin needle hanging out of his arm and a line of hookers in his room at The Motel 6.)

Anyway, I asked a cabbie outside my hotel and the guy not only said yes, but he acted like he’d just won the lottery.  It turns out he was $300 in the hole for his January lease, and the Feb lease was due the next day.   He had to charge me the flat rate of $95.00 each way.  No problem.  (funny thing is, I think he was worried I’d look for other options after hearing how much it was going to be.  This is funny because at the time I probably would’ve paid more if I had to.)

So, thanks to Moe the cab driver, I had my own bag back by 10:30pm.    It could’ve been worse.  A lot worse.  How you ask?  Well, when we went on vacation last April, Mrs Commish wrote out the blue and white name tag you see attached to my bag.  Up until then, I had no identification on my bag.  If that wasn’t on there, Shannon would’ve had no idea who the bag belonged to.  And guess what.  Shannon didn’t have his name on his bag, so I wouldn’t have had any idea how to contact him.   Imagine that nightmare.

So a HUGE THANK YOU to Mrs. Commish.   Saved my ass big time.

I’m still amazed that I made such rookie mistake after all these years of traveling.

Anyway, all was well that ends well.  Of course, at the time I landed in Chicago I was closer to feeling like like Private Pyle about 2:15 seconds into this clip than anything else.

Now go put a name tag on your suitcase.

If you haven’t seen this video already, don’t watch it.  Or at least hold off for as long as possible, and watch it a few hours before the game this Sunday.

I just watched it and now I’m going out of my mind.

God, I hope the Pats win.  I think they will but I’m a little nervous and here’s why.

Remember the time Pittsburgh came into Foxboro and the rumor was they had already booked their trip to the Super Bowl, b/c they were certain of a victory?   And then they lost.

I think the Pats are smarter than that, so I shouldn’t have anything to worry about.  But anything can happen in NFL playoffs.  So I’ll hold off on booking my trip until they Win.


P.S.  I’m not going to the Super Bowl if they win.  I went to the one in Indianapolis and it was too stressful (the actual game itself).  The trip overall was amazing, but I swore I’d never go to another one if my team was in it.  I’d rather go to one where I have no skin in the game.  Plus, it’s the same weekend as the Pond Hockey Classic.  And there’s no way I’m missing that.

Go Pats.

Some of you heard the news already, that I sold my motorcycle.   It’s never an easy thing to do, but this time it was the right thing to do.

Yes, it sat around the garage too much, but that’s not really why I sold it.

I sold it because it was too fast.

How fast?


It went over 60mph in 1st gear.


Around 90mph in 2nd gear.


About 120 mph in 3rd gear.


And it still had a 4th gear, a 5th gear, and a 6th gear.

Like I said, too fast.  So I sold it.

I also sold it because whenever I got on it, I tried to ride it like the guy in this video.

So, as I tweeted (because that’s what EL Capitan does, he tweets) Goodbye my friend.

May I live longer without you.


Everyone always wanted to know the fastest I ever went on it.  And the truth is, I don’t know.

I remember glancing down during one ride and seeing something in the range of 130mph.

Once you’re in the 120+ range, it really doesn’t matter how fast you’re going.  If you fall off (or hit something) you die.

And so, I sold it.

Not because I didn’t enjoy it, but because I must be getting older, and somehow a little smarter?




That’s right.  You’re not in it.

In fact, you probably don’t even know what it is.  That’s how far away you are from being a member.
You’re not in it now, and you never will be.  (neither will I)

But you want to be.   And a lot of other people certainly wish you were.

It’s called the Great Guy Club.    Probably the most exclusive club on the planet.

A lot of you are probably thinking, Wait, I’m a great guy!  I’m in the club!

Typical knee jerk reaction, but unfortunately, you’re wrong.

Here’s the deal.  It’s actually easy to be in the club.

All it takes is the following: Whenever your name is brought up in a conversation, you have to be referred to as a Great Guy.
See that?   It’s easy.

Here are the details: As long as people always refer to you as a great guy you stay in the club.  But if someone refers to you as something other than great (he’s a good guy, he’s ok, etc…) you are no longer in the club.


Here are a couple of examples.

-Example #1 ~ a one on one conversation

Kobelski: Hey do you know Gaylord Focker?

Tavenner: Oh sure, he’s a Great Guy.

Kobelski: I think so too.
-ResultGaylord is in the Great Guy Club.


-Example #2 ~ a group conversation

Kobelski: You guys know Jules Winnfield?

Berube: I do know him, he’s a great guy.

Tavenner: Spot on Mr. Kraft, he’s a great guy.

Ring: Yep, known him for years. Great guy.

-Result ~Jules is in the Great Guy Club because everyone referred to him as a Great Guy.


-Example #3 ~ a group conversation

Kobelski: You guys know Jerry Lundergaard?

Tavenner: I do know him, he’s a great guy.

Berube: Know him! I love that guy. He’s a great guy.

Ring: Yep, known him for years. Great guy.

Casey: Lundergaard?  I used to work with Lundergaard.  He’s a good guy.

~Result ~In this example Jerry Lundergaard was about to get his membership card, but was shut down because he was referred to as a good guy.

And that’s it for the poor bastard.

He’s not getting in.



Remember, it has to be unanimous.  Always.   Every single person asked about you has to think of you as a Great Guy.

I guess there may be a rare example when there’s only one person on earth that will say Jerry is a Good Guy vs a Great Guy.

Maybe that particular person (Casey, in the above example) just doesn’t think anyone is a Great Guy.   In this case, it can be overruled because the opinion of the one individual is dismissed.

That said, this has never happened.   Generally, if one person thinks of him as a Good Guy, it’s likely there are more who feel the same way.

See? It’s easy.

Or nearly impossible.  It really depends on how you look at things I guess.

And that’s why you’re not in it.


Think any of the Badgers are in it?  I can think of one or two that might be considered.

Need an example of someone who IS in the club?

Former Badger, Mike Greene.

That’s what we’re talking about here.


We’re talking about the Catalina Wine Mixer, type of Guy.


I’m a big Halloween guy.
But last year, Krafty blew me out of the water by a mile.  (As did Mrs Kraft as Adrian).

I dressed as a cop, and Mrs Commish was a cop too.   I thought I was pretty impressive since I borrowed stuff from a friend who is a State Cop.

He gave me a fake Cop gun (looked so real I didn’t dare take it into the restaurant we went to before the house party we went to), a real Cop baseball cap, Cop belt w/Cop handcuffs, etc…

It was dope.   I was dope.   All I needed was an old Cop car with Cop tires, Cop suspension, Cop Shocks…

Then Rocky shows up with Adrian.

This is him w the Cop gun.  Scaring the shit out of anyone on the deck.

Or rather, making them piss their pants laughing.  He shouted “Everyone hit the deck, or your ass is mine” and they ran into the house. (I’m not sure what he actually said but it was damn funny).


It’s honestly one of my favorite pictures of all time.

Then there’s this video.  One of my favorite video’s of all time.

I love how TB1K is in the background, dancing along side Krafty Balboa, like he’s his trainer.   Oh, and T-Bone’s riding an ostrich.

Back inside, we ran into the guy from the State Farm insurance commercials.

You know, the guy wearing the fishing hat, “I found you a dollar”



I tell ya.  That TB1K, he comes up w genius stuff w/absolutely no effort.

Halloween’s coming boyz.

Let’s make it a good effort.




I was in Florida last week for business and I had to get a rental car.

I use Hertz and have for over 20 years.

Why?  Because they take care of The Commish.

Always have.

Well, maybe not always.

This is what they put me in last week.    And as I walked up to the car, and had a chance to switch vehicles before leaving the airport, I said “Screw it.  Who’s going to see me.”


And for the most part, no one saw me.

(Plus, I kind of like driving different cars when I’m on the road.   Makes me feel like an auto aficionado.)

But then I was crusing down the highway, (Joe Walsh pumping, eating the catch of the day from a restaurant called Captain Hook) and a mini-van starts to drive along side of me.

I look over and it’s a Mom, about my age, and she’s smiling at me.

I think:

-Man. are people friendly down here.

-Maybe she thinks I’m cute.

-Maybe she knows I’m The Commish. (no)

Then I realize, she’s not smiling at me.

She was laughing.

All of a sudden I was Brad Hamilton, delivering the catch of the day boxes, over to the guys at IBM.

Only, I wasn’t even wearing a Pirate Hat.

Guess I should’ve switched the rental car before exiting the terminal.

Florida.  Never misses an opportunity to amuse me.

This is my day so far.  Enjoy.

8:45am – Holy Shit moment.

This is the time that I realized I was supposed to be in North Andover for a continuing education class (for work).   However, I was at my desk in Boston, talking to my Mom (who turns 75 today, Happy Birthday Mom) because I completely forgot about it.

9:07am – Jesus Christ Moment

This is when I realized I would have to pay $37.00 upon exiting the parking garage because the early bird special rate of $20.00 only applies if you enter before 7:30am and leave after 4pm.

9:23am – God Damn It Moment

(Yeah, it got better.)  This is when I realized I was driving to an appointment that would require me to present a valid government issued ID.  This normally isn’t a problem but my license expired on August 19th and I haven’t had a chance to renew it yet.  This is also normally a non-issue because I have a passport that I carry in my work bag.  However, I left that particular bag under my desk, in Boston.   And I was already in Somerville.

9:24am – Holy Shit Moment #2

You wouldn’t believe the amount of traffic heading back into town.  It took me 25 minutes to get from Charlestown to my building near the aquarium.

1:30pm – Jesus Christ Moment #2

The Continuing Ed class was complete, and I was on my way back into town.  While cruising at a very high rate of speed, I began to quickly approach a slowpoke in the left lane.  No Problem.  I noticed a way around the cars in front of me, but it would take a three lane pass.  However, when I got into the far right lane, I was blocked by one of the middle lane cars.   I looked to the left and noticed a car in my blind spot.  It was too close.  It would’ve been dangerous to cut in front of it.

So under my breath I uttered something like “Well, are you going to speed up or slow down.  Jesus Christ.”

And with that, they sped up.  And as I looked over I saw this.



Pretty damn funny.

I’m now parked at a meter, so I’m guessing my God Damn It Moment #2 will be when I get to my car after work and find a ticket, even though I’m paying the meter.

Ouch, you Fat Penquin